[自創小說]小丹傻左 o口o [複製鏈接]

有一日 迪雲同小丹去踢波…. c_ 1.  
Y#-pK)EeU  
由迪雲發動攻勢 小丹一招真豹影拳將個波炸爆左 hdH-VR4  
d{'u97GDc  
迪雲好大聲咁罵小丹:你做緊咩啊!!! gWj
z3ob  
@q" #.?>s  
小丹話:我咪係到玩你!!! L|2WTyMU  
>Cr'dKZ}  
迪雲粗聲粗氣咁講:你比番個波我啊!!!個波係大哥送比我既!!!你至小比番1000蚊我!!! QN~9O^  
-Ze2]^#dl  
小丹話:我比番一個全世界得一個既波你啦!!! -S$Y0FDV  
6O'B:5~
[2  
(小丹進行異轉 用音速射球射向迪雲 迪雲瓜左) eNt1P`2[  
LCpS}L;  
小丹話:啦!!!波我就比左你 係你接唔到姐!!! 88啦!!! N*
hx;k9  
cC`PmDGq  
係就係好短希望大家中意      註明:100分全分 唔好踩到咁勁~~~

又係你呀 K06&.>v_  
篇野又係爛到 F, p~O{ Q  
1.口語 :,dO7dJi  
2.最重要個樣...就係人物性格..

爛到x咁呀= =好無聊= =

別再POST你的爛文了

迪雲咁容易死

gag 爆 - - 未見過 音速射球當足球

大佬..夠了-_-你練好你d文筆先啦

一個真昇頂開佢啦--

又在放爛文的小子給我過來 ]
E1aIt  
讓我請你吃個波餅,使你的文沒這樣爛

唔得唔得 ;~Ke5os=s  
笑死我啦

只可以話好好笑

滴露大大看完你作的東西既評句 _ECWSfZ  
[HJ^'/bB'  
還真想狠狠地揮拳打向顯示器呢 PiMW29B^  
zkXG%I4h  
你的文真是有吸引力 opQ%!["N  
請你努力作多一些:)

唔?好好聽呀,繼續作落去!

有d無聊 but都好好笑- -

都係0分,要重作 }%_h|N  
原因:又係爛到爆

呀生!迪雲咁易死,你唔好話佢比故事1-學校d車手1拳打死!

好垃圾

迪雲傻左 =fmM=@!$<  
ax{+7 k  
有一日迪雲行行下街見到小丹 49b#$Xq  
小丹:hello %_xRS  
迪雲:hello你個頭!真升龍霸 *B"p:F7J|  
90OSe{  
係唔係好好笑呢(風刺) O>e2MT|#k  
\s
B a  
唉= = *:r@-=M3=  
你唔好post la ,4$ZB(\  
你係都整長小小先la plx

「好」到爆 {qO[93yg)/  
Hts.G~~ 8  
0分重作 H^ _[IkuA%  
4QbDDvRQ^  
0分算比多你 #({0HFSC:j  
ZuIr=`"j  
希望你會進步吧= = 
39|
W(,  
,!U._ic'B  
迷:4502 進步?!難呀!

嘩 [DS.@97n  
好文好文 J})G l  
點睇都唔明 >Micc   
我比0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000.1分你